Sunday, March 30, 2008

Essence of Hippies

Bohemia offers an excellent massage, and this weekend, I learned that they offer soy candles in recycled tin containers with artfully designed labels. The nag champa scent evokes powerful, positive emotions for me, and much to my delight, Bohemia offers it in a candle. I've only found it in incense, and since a couple of nasty bouts with bronchitis, incense is a painful breathing experience. The smell has so many pleasant memories. It reminds me of a favorite new age store where I like to take yoga classes. The whole smell is tied up in the experience of stretching, relaxing, and becoming more quiet. None of this is very helpful, to those who haven't smelled it. While I believe that patchouli is the essence of hippies, nag champa is the essence of yogis. Mmmmm. Bliss.

And speaking of hippies, the long-haired hubby returned again to pick up more things. He's living with his parents, and today he mentioned a handful of interesting things. 1) His bedroom is gone since his parents are remodelling the basement. 2) His parents are driving him nuts. 3) The guest room has been converted to a sewing room. 4) He is sleeping on the couch. Despite my best intentions of having an amicable divorce and taking the high road, refraining from schadenfreude is impossible. We signed our divorce papers at the lawyer's office on Thursday night. It will be official in late May -- just about a week after our eleventh anniversary.

Seeing him today was so difficult. Not being involved in the decision to separate really hurt. I don't know why I expected to be consulted, but I did. And I'm angry. I don't want to be bitter or sad, but I am. So there I was with all of this turmoil and protective anger, and he brought me a hot chocolate from Starbucks. We used to have Starbucks on the deck every Saturday morning. It was the highlight of our week. It was so sweet and so sad. It undid me. I retreated to the den and cried. Then I knitted the Oblique and pulled myself back together. Tonight, I'm looking forward to a lovely evening soy candles, a good book, and an early bedtime.

Also a shout out to the funny and amusing Mel, who finally joined the blogging world at http://gotanychocolate.blogspot.com/.

4 comments:

J. Denae said...

You're one of my favorite people in the whole world and I am proud of how you are handling all of these current stressors. You're doing a great job.

MHellon said...

I concur with jillo, you're doing an awesome job handling all the crap that's being thrown at you, I wish I could be there but I am happy I'll be moving closer!!

MHellon said...

BTW, thanks for the shout out!!!

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